I’m female and bi and it is definitely noticeable when someone is staring at my chest and it is very uncomfortable. When I was younger there were certain guys that rarely looked me in my face and were just looking at my chest the whole time. I asked other girls about it and they agreed they too felt them gazing at their chests and it was really uncomfortable and off-putting for them as well. If you wanna help then tell them discreetly to tighten their bra straps. Otherwise I don’t find it acceptable to stare at a woman’s chest. A glance maybe but you should really be looking at their faces. People are not meat or eye candy, don’t objectify them, just remember the person they are inside. There may be women ok with it and like flaunting it but that’s not been my personal experience.

I hate that simplex is like this.

I prefer end to end encryption, like in Matrix, Signal, SimpleX, etc. So I don’t use Lemmy for PMs since they are not actually private, hell I went quite a while where I stopped using Lemmy because it is not meant for someone interested in their own privacy despite the irony of having multiple privacy focused communities. If someone doesn’t want to host instances dedicated to CSAM I could see them wanting to defederate, but so far I’ve seen defederation used as a temper tantrum. It’s always over some stupid drama. If you don’t want to host whatever then what is the point of opening your instance to other people? I fail to see why someone would bother going through this trouble and then say no you can’t view this community meant for modifying your nintendo switch. Even reddit does not care as much as the instance owners on Lemmy do. It’s just baffling. Also good luck deleting your posts and comments. Ugh this convo makes me hate Lemmy again.

I also would rather manage what I block or federate to. I hate that Lemmy enables instances to have too much control over its users, deciding what you can and cannot see and admins can see your PMs too. I got fed up with Lemmy.world because of their federation fuckups, why would communities that talk about piracy but don’t link to anything cause an admin to get sued? They won’t, reddit allows more piracy talk than Lemmy.world does lmao. Obviously Nintendo searches through the fediverse for anyone even saying they pirated stuff, right guys?! Nah I just don’t care for their admins. I usually dont agree with whatever their admins say, I even saw someone from world complain about Lemmy.world policies on their thread and the user got their account deleted by an admin with a nice smug response from them. I can’t have my own instance since I don’t have the money to spare, otherwise I would since it is BS that Lemmy doesn’t allow users to have the same control over their feed as an admin.

I think people are too terminally online and use these phrases to justify being an ass to someone not in the know. In reddit it was always a mod getting pissed at someone having a different opinion (and no I’m not talking about being racist as a different opinion) or asking questions because they don’t know about the subject. They cry sealion and ban the person. Other people say I don’t think they were a sealion, and get banned too. Really it seems more like a, “I disagree and have nothing more to say and now will ban you.”

I think it’s fine to ask questions, and point out if there is a flaw in someone’s logic. If someone wants to stop talking then that’s fine and should be respected. But this comic makes it seem like the lady is racist for no reason and the sea lion is fine until the last 3 panels when the sea lion doesn’t leave after being told to go away.

I’ve heard this term before from a power mod and I’m surprised that this comes from a webcomic that doesn’t even fit any time I’ve seen someone cry sealion. When I read the Wikipedia page it describes something else than the comic which I can agree more with, the author is quoted as saying, “The core of what I set out to criticize is just the notion that any random patient stranger should feel entitled to as much of someone’s attention as they want.” Idk the rest of the Wikipedia page talks more of mind reading, you can’t tell what someone means online since there is no tone and you don’t know the other person well enough. If they are just doing the first 3 panels then it is fine. The last time I saw a “sealion” happen was when mods of a sub announced a new unpopular rule that they knew people would leave the sub because of and anyone who disagreed were called a sealion and banned.

Sorry for ranting about this, I just now was reminded of why I hate this term that is usually misused because of your comment. Feel free to ignore me, I don’t think I deserve some random person’s undivided attention, plus arguments/debates stress me out anyway.

Thank you for posting that link. I’m not fed up (completely?) yet I suppose but it was eye-opening. I’ll have to be a lot more careful about posting, possibly not post again.

This is definitely a con of Lemmy for me. I like to be more privacy focused but Lemmy gives you 0 privacy on whatever you do on the website. Anyone who wants more privacy on Lemmy is told you have no right to privacy, don’t expect any privacy, everything you do is public on the internet, etc. A massive boner killer for me. I think basic things like deleting your own post or comments should actually get removed from all servers, PMs should not be viewable by anyone except the recipients, and what you vote on or subscribe to should be private. Lemmy doesn’t sell your data but that’s because anyone can take the data for free. I thought this stuff was because Lemmy is still new and will get to it eventually but the push back seems to say this was a choice or is not broken. I ended up exploring different social media alternatives but I like the style of Lemmy better since it is more reddit-like with an active user base plus has different android clients. I don’t like kbin because it shows who upvoted or downvoted something to everyone - it’s not accountability when it erodes your privacy.

I used to comment on Lemmy more but then I ran into this problem when juggling multiple accounts, Liftoff sucks ass at letting you know which account you are logged into (I use Summit now and it is better at it) so I ended up getting my accounts’ wires crossed when I thought using the drop down on your accounts changed your account but no you have to go to manage instances to switch which was not intuitive. I ended up abandoning the accounts when I couldn’t figure out how to actually delete the post from the server.

Edit: man I wish I saw this sooner, might be time for me to either stop posting again or look somewhere else.

I have to agree. I considered Standard Notes but I would have to pay for super notes in order to use images, even if I self-host. Same for code blocks, organizing notes into folders, spreadsheets, web clipper. Have to get the most expensive plan for offline access and being able to have local backups, although it is discounted if you self-host completely but why still pay a sub at that point? I would rather pay once and then be able to self-host using their super notes without paying more every month.

I liked Obsidian but wanted encryption that works on my android so I went with Joplin.

I wish I could install lineage on my s10+ snapdragon. I just got this phone and now I just ordered a pixel to get grapheneos. I was willing to pay this guy on telegram to unlock my phone so I could try to get lineage to work or at least a custom rom, but my bootloader is one update off, I have v6 but he only supports up to v5. I hate ordering new devices when my current ones are still functional. I also am getting rid of my fitbit I also just got and replacing it with the amazon band 5 since it can connect to gadgetbridge. Degoogling is expensive, it shouldn’t be this bad just to get privacy. I’m not sure what to do with my devices I am replacing, but I hate that they had to be replaced in the first place. I also switched from google services to proton mail/drive/vpn.

Same but I went with proton.

Has anyone read their privacy policy?

We may be required to disclose Users personal data in order to protect our legal rights or where disclosure of Users personal data’s are required of us by the judicial authorities only when legal procedures are followed.

Files links that Users download are stored in a database for legal concerns and our internal use. All saved links are erased within 1 month for security reasons and service needs. However all requests made on our site are stored for 1 year, the legal retention period.

I would prefer they had a no-logging policy. This sounds fishy af like a honeypot.