I don’t even know what Google Books is. Also, I don’t care.

Well, I don’t think they could be any more hated.

It’s actually a scam pushed by Big Water to get you to use more water and line their pockets.

Email is becoming obsolete anyway. I only use it personally to register accounts online. I have an old email address that I got 20 years ago. I haven’t checked it in years. It holds several hundred thousand emails and was constantly full of junk mail. It just became totally useless to me a long time ago.

We use email at work, but not as much as we used to because there are better ways to communicate since everyone has a phone. We don’t even use the computers in our offices much anymore because it’s just easier to use a phone. The execs have tablets that they carry around, then dock at their desks. They don’t even have desktop computers anymore.

Usually the product with the most money behind it wins, unfortunately.

I’m someone who knows that every person is both good and bad, and it’s a struggle that every one has. Looking at things as black and white, and every human struggle as being a fight against good and evil is a very misplaced, and dangerous way of thinking.

Morphine

Too many people see the world in black and white. You are either good or evil. Every person is both good and evil, but the media and propagandists want you to see one side as pure evil. Obviously it works because I see these kinds of posts everywhere. I don’t see it getting any better since everyone carries a handheld propaganda machine with them all the time.

Everything looks smaller when I look between my legs.

Arrested Development did a great job with their reboot.

Then why does this season suck so badly?

It’s a mix of a Delorean, a Lamborghini Countach, and a turd.

You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile.

Wait, that’s the government’s stance also.

I heard several news stories stating that they had, but I guess that’s my fault for believing the news. I just assumed they would get something right eventually.

There’s a reason they got rid of that motto.

My mom won’t pick a date for me just because I’m married.

I completely disagree with you. Maybe it’s because I’m old, but I don’t want any damned racist robot doctor telling me what to do. I just want my good old human, racist doctor treating me; like God intended.

It works very well in my brake system.

Obviously you missed the announcement that it is, indeed, the end of the world.