My experience has been more like
“As a cat I am no one’s… Hey, where are you going with the food? Hey, hey! HEY! I AM YOUR CAT! I AM YOUR CAT!”
“I wouldn’t say you own me, but it is cold in here and your lap is warm, so maybe I own your lap”.
More like “give me food servant!”
Unless it’s within two hours in either direction of the cats feeding time, in which case “I wuv u, have u noticed ur poor kitty is starving and the food bowl is empty? Here let me get all up in your face in case you’ve forgotten about me…”
Also, hey hello, now look at my butthole.
Apparently that’s due to their mothers licking the buttholes to clean them when they were little
So they are going, “You’re my parent now, get to cleaning”
TIL: I have a perpetually disappointed cat.
Hey that cat is from Ohio
My cat rarely bothers us about food. But if we’ve not played with him, or toured the (exterior, communal building) hallway in the last few hours…he doth scream.
And I’m pretty sure he uses his abs when meowing because the boi can project!
Meanwhile their bowl has plenty of food in it, but because the bottom is visible, the rest no longer exists
I’ve heard that the issue for some cats isn’t that they can see the bottom, but that their whiskers hit the side of the bowl and that’s uncomfortable.
Yeah you’re supposed to put their food on plates, that’s also why they often won’t drink from water bowls, hence the market for little fountains for them to drink from.
Cats would literally rather die than rub their whiskers against something. I can almost relate.
People often describe their cats as Hannibal Lecter, mine is just a dumb idiot creature baby
most cats i meet are just chill dogs who require a polite greeting before loving you
“oh, a random human? hm yes okay you’re nice, oh you want to pick me up? PURRRRRRR”
And a polite greeting is pretty simple. I just offer my hand limp and palm down for a sniff. If you get a nuzzle then it’s petting time, baby.
blessed be the jackson galaxy, teaching us to greet cats like adam greeted god
Huh, I actually didn’t know this was a thing, I just noticed that it works.
I’m only a cat, so I’ll stay in my place. Up here on your chair or in bed on your face.
Ah fuck my cats call me Vivian, don’t they.
Come now, Vivian, don’t be like that.
licks arsehole
I have a black kitten who LOVES belly rubs. He’s so weird.
I don’t think I’ve known a cat that didn’t like their belly rubbed.
I think it’s just a trust thing. Cat ain’t going to like their belly rubbed if they don’t trust you.
And the only cat I’ve known “not to like” belly rubs absolutely loves them, but he will also try to claw and bite the shit out of your hand while you do, which is why you use an oven mitt while giving them.
Like, he will literally try to bring you that oven mitt and roll over for you in anticipation.Or maybe he just likes murder.
It’s a cat the boundary between games and casual murder is very thin!
My kittens would grab on to you and bite your hand (not hard enough to injure you) if you pet their belly. I used to dust the floor with them when they would do it to me.
Yeah a kitten is going to think that means play time. Sometimes just walking into the room will make them think it’s play time.
Cats are the original sovereign citizens.
Whose human am I?
I like cats
Cats like me
Cats and I very truly agree!
You don’t own a cat. The cat owns you.
