I started uni 2014 and I’ve still yet to finish it because of life BS. Dealing with depression / ADHD has made finishing my degree seem impossible for me to do and I feel like an absolute failure everyday because of it. I wasted many semesters attempting clases and then dropping out when my grades weren’t good.
My parents both graduated by their early 20s and had me at 23; I’ll be 29 soon and I still live with them working at a Walmart to make ends meet and even with that I’m about to be fired for poor performance. I feel depressed being there because I was given everything in life to be successful and yet I wasted my 20s away being depressed / suicidal. All of my friends all have graduated long ago and have better jobs and I get envious seeing them being successful. All I think about is splattering my brains all over the wall.
I don’t have a plan to follow, every day I’m just hating myself for wasting my best years over stupid shit instead of focusing.
I understand you, it’s hard to tolerate your own brain not wanting to give you the motivation you think you need.
In my case, it helps to write down everything I need to do to accomplish my goal in individual simple tasks and then focusing in the ONE SIMPLE IMMEDIATE THING I need to do in order to do the next one.
Please don’t push you too hard, we live in difficult times and struggling is normal, I believe the conditions will improve in the near future.