I’m right there with you. It’s too fucking perfect of a story for it to be true. What else did they find in his bag? Nuclear launch codes?

They harpoon their dicks into the other snail. Look it up lol.

Canada, but still

I’ll pick being alone in the woods with a bear

It’s more that the price has moved so much in about 2 years. I don’t really care, because I can’t eat pizza anymore, but it’s interesting to see it so clearly laid out.

Honestly, it makes more sense - what am I, a mid-level scientist, going to bring to that corporate atmosphere? You’re going to ask me to brainstorm in a meeting with an Executive VP? Yeah. Fucking. Right.

You give me work, I do the work. Yes I might need to ask a question, but that’s uncommon and I can just teams for that.

The seniors execs? That makes sense. They need to all be on the same page, and talking to each other. Collaborating etc.

Ware your dark chocolate sources, my dear. Apparently Lindt has a ton of metals in it, which is tragic because they’re my favorite chocolate.

Thank you - replaced

It’s sad when bae leaves

Ariel Castro laughs nervously

Holy that’s a lot of food. At the very least he did meal prep for the week

I post a L O T

A-fucking-mazing

The goofiest

The Sacred Band has entered the chat

Please tell me they wore that to a work Christmas party

Still works with the half their age plus 700 rule

Just remember to push the little button on the side of the door first

Its called the Pomodoro method, but I switch off with shitposts

Honestly - the joker is more the stark raving lunatic rather than the cold blooded psychopath. He’s more liable to strap you into a rollercoaster, set it off, and have a cream pie (not that one) waiting for you at the end of it - the impact of which kills you - rather than blowing up boat full of people.